TBH, I was not planning to send a newsletter today. I did not really have anything to write and thought I’d practice restraint rather than clog your inbox with uninspired noise. But, alas, I had the most amazing and satisfying installation this morning and found inspiration in the unlikeliest of sources.

Eric the art handler from Museum Services is an art handler extraordinaire by day and philosopher on the side. I knew my client had hit it off with him during delivery last week because he replied to the group text shortly afterwards letting Eric know he had just bought the book he recommended. But then this morning my client shared another story.

During delivery, Eric asked about the art that was being delivered. My client froze and panicked because he couldn’t remember the name of the artist. Grappling for a response, he said, “The art is more my wife’s thing.” And Eric dropped a truth bomb. Eric responded, “That’s great. Every time you look at it, you can get to know her a little bit better.”

Yeah, I’ll let that sink in for a sec…

In addition to being an art sherpa for my clients, I also serve as a pseudo marriage counselor. I frequently encounter couples whose respective tastes in art are not so simpatico, shall we say. Unfortunately, they do not screen for art taste compatibility in premarital counseling. But, in all seriousness, a big part of my job is bringing all the stakeholders to the table and finding a work or an artist that satisfies the goals and visions of everyone. Sometimes we even throw in an opinionated interior designer for extra fun! It is a wonderful thing when we find a resolution that suits everyone but that often means that everyone has to compromise on something. C’est la vie, n’est pas? Eric has shed some light on another avenue forward though.

For many, many couples, the non-negotiable criterion for any purchase is “we BOTH have to love it.” I generally see the wisdom behind that idea. If it is hanging in OUR house, then we should BOTH love it. And perhaps this is the guiding principle behind the major purchases for the important locations—your mantles, over-the-sofa walls, foyers, etc… But what if sometimes, maybe one party gets to pick something they really love, even if the other partner isn’t so excited about it? And then, and this is the kicker, we don’t view that as one party compromising but rather appreciating an alternative perspective and loving the way that reflects the person with whom they are ostensibly in love. What if we shifted the paradigm a bit so that an art collection that reflects a family means that it reflects who they are as a unit and who they are as individuals??

Instead of viewing these differences of opinion as an obstacle to overcome, what if we looked at them as opportunities for relationship growth. A running joke with so many couples is that “his art” or “her art” gets relegated to an out-of-the-way guest room or an office so that the offended partner does not have to rest their weary gaze upon so disgusting a picture. But what if these artistic divergences became loci of connection? Instead of conversation-starting cards, your art collection could become the topic of the dinner table.

I’m not saying that it should be a free-for-all and everyone just gets what they want all the time. Some of the best purchases come when the group members push one another to keep looking for the perfect thing. But I do think we should take a page from Eric’s playbook and rethink our approach to those works that maybe we don’t love but our partner can’t live without!

Thanks for wandering down the path of wisdom with me. Enjoy your weekend everyone!

Air kisses (cuz EXPO is next week and homegirl is outta practice),

Casey